Showing posts with label Til Death Do Us Blart 2015. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Til Death Do Us Blart 2015. Show all posts

Sunday, April 19, 2026

April 19 poem

for 'Til Death Do Us Part 2015

The lore begins here: / The Shadowman was a joke / now immortalized

At the time of recording the first of
an unknowable number of episodes:
the domain is secured. Operations
happening concurrent with creation
of this premiere premier top tier podcast.
I am not tracking the number of times
Tim & Guy make space for Justin to laugh
himself off the mic, but that is the track
I'm on, wondering if I will ever
stop learning facts about a movie
I am determined never to watch.
I don't want to know.
No one's going to check the email
until or unless there's a lore-keeper.

The jokes will repeat / this is going to happen / until this thing ends

The picture on the front cover of Alice's Restaurant the Cookbook has Alice sitting in an armchair in her kitchen. She looks delighted. I remember reading in the book as a child that one should always have an armchair in one's kitchen. My experience has made cushions of seat pads on wooden chairs at the kitchen table. It is a place to bond with a book, a craft, a podcast, some organizing or tidying. It is where I most often enjoy the careening conversation of 'Til Death Do Us Blart, something I am in no way obligated to do, and yet.

Warm in the kitchen / redefining holiday / one year at a time

Wednesday, November 20, 2024

Til Death Do Us Blart 2015 - it begins

Okay, so basically it's a podcast show that only happens once a year and it happens on American Thanksgiving (which of course I don't celebrate but I do get time off work so I do this and cook food and do literally anything that's not shopping) and you can find it here: https://www.themcelroy.family/deathdousblart .

Yes. It's a McElroy Brothers & Tim & Guy production. Five guys watch Paul Blart Mall Cop, Too and talk about it. It's not the best idea. I love it so very much. (It used to be that I would listen to the classic tune Alice's Restaurant every year, but the last time I listened I was fully caught off guard by the use of a slur about gay folks towards the back end of the piece and, you know. I get to say no.) 

What follows is a reaction to this reaction, to this show, this work of Art, this extended contemplation of what can only be called Utter CrapShitGarbage. 

There will be 10 of these because there are 10 of those, except there will actually be 11 because the gathered boys dropped a surprise in 2020, so there's one more.

TDdUB 2015

Did they know? Do we know even now?
The lead up to a holiday I do no honor &
will use for better ends is dusted in the sounds
of good good boys surviving every year &
the inevitable mediocrity and garbage of Paul Blart Mall Cop, Too.
The part where that movie's name is 5 syllables.